The Magic of Twins

I should write about the market, you know, February 2^nd and the stats are out. Instead, I chose to do a quick blurb on family life, and to be more specific, twins. The dream and ultimate horror of so many parents. I have heard it countless times, seriously, more times than I am able to imagine… “How do you do it? – Well, didn’t really have a choice did I. “I’ve always wanted twins! You are so super lucky!!!!” – Yes, I agree. I’m super lucky, but it for sure didn’t feel that way during the 16 weeks of bedrest before they were born or during those first two or three years…. The years when every single thing one would relate to parenting an infant, I did twice. Washing, changing, feeding, carrying. I remember an old Facebook post where I counted closer to 30 diaper changes during my hubs workday, see one diarrhea equals two diarrheas with twinsies. I also remember how scared I was that the lack of cuddles would seriously hurt them. I did not have time to cuddle, I was on a schedule. I was a parent of a two-year-old and twins.

I have no memories of the first two years. No, I do remember feeding two kids in two highchairs in a raincoat. I remember sitting on the floor with two bottles, balancing a baby on each knee being thankful for having two knees. I remember one running and me running after the one whilst the other one was sitting and screaming after me as I was running after the other. I remember dreading to go out in the world as I knew I would be followed by a herd of admirers… “Are they twins?” “I’ve always wanted twins!” “How do you tell them apart?” I remember a lot of tears – my tears. Memories of the first two years with the boys are not cheerful, but instead filled with desperation and frustration. This was the time when I we, as a couple were closest to getting a divorce in our almost 25 years together. That’s how bad it was.

In Finland, February 2^nd, is celebrated as the national celebration for twins. I watch mine lay on the floor, enjoying Friday night and iPads. They’re there, right next to each other sharing a game. Not on the same screen but playing the same game together on different screens. Their legs are touching, heads maybe eight inches apart, and they discuss the game as they’re going about it. Twins. Built-in best friends.

There’s something magical about twins. Something only a parent of twins would be able to see and feel. They’re almost 8 years old. They still sleep in the same bed. They still share their dinner, meaning; “you eat the veggies and I’ll have the meat.” They bathe together, and they even pee together… you see, it’s a twin thing as I found myself explaining to my kids’ dentist the other day embarrassedly when they went to the bathroom together. When one is somewhere else, the other one feels somewhat lost, and they always - really, really always – have each other’s backs. It’s extremely rare to see them in an argument, and anyone with more than one child knows how very special that is.

There’s really no limit in how blessed I feel when it comes to watching these two growing together. The connection that has been there ever since they met in my womb. The connection that makes their sister feel terribly left out almost daily as the two “get” each other without words.

They’re almost 8 years old now. One has glasses and darker hair, the other one is almost platinum blonde and several inches taller, yet every now and then someone will for sure ask me how I’m able to tell them apart. Not all twins are identical. Most are not.

Happy Twin Day!